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February 28 青青校园一直很喜欢自己的学校,红墙绿地,60年代的建筑,典型的红砖大学
每年伊始,嫩黄水仙就会绽放在每一个角落,在融融春雪里是天然风景
昨天去学校见导师,路过图书馆前的小广场,年青的小姑娘们正在摆摊集会,T-SHIRT上红色的SLOGAN是:
I LOVE MY VAGINA
当然这是关于远离STD的集会,小姑娘们神情严肃
作为年青的女性是应该学会保护自己,特别是在最容易人生得意需尽欢的灿烂年代
爱和性都是好的
好好享受更要好好好爱护自己的身体和心灵
当年小甜甜来BRIGHTON,在NORTH LANE小店里买了一件T-SHIRT招摇过市,上面写着
DINE ME, WINE ME, 69ME
一直以为这是看过最搞笑的文化衫
导师开始画图,一见图就开始犯晕,于是赶紧一起下到CAFE里边喝咖啡边听他讲图
知道自己这方面太弱太弱
所以有时很害怕,害怕论文建构得不够严密,会破绽百出
有时也想,这学位现在似乎成了一种两难,拿偏文/理论的学位显然对找工作帮助不大,即使顺利,从RESEARCH FOLLOWER做起,到退休大概也就是SENIOR LECTURER,而且已经是最大极限,其次公司一定是基本没戏,,再次,运气最好的情况下找到准政府研究机构,能参与到一个一个的项目里
即使回国,国籍换了基本也去不了大学和机构
而且有家了,不能说走就走
所以,只能说这是本人一项未竞的工作,要完成,至于完成之后有无现实意义,则不考虑
导师则哫狭说,这种训练能让你的信用卡是DR.打头,哈哈
四两拔千斤
每次来去学校都是火车,窗外或晴或阴或雨或雪,但风景不变
P.S 和和每日例行散步照片
February 25 世仇世仇1000米女子速滑决赛,最后一圈,韩国朴超过王濛
虽然体育超越国界,还是郁闷
和和学我们对着蓝衣韩国MM大喝:打!打!打!
亲爱的小和和后脑勺终于长出了一撮长些的头发,所以最近都喊她'一撮毛'
用爸爸的话讲:what a pretige tuft of hair on my baby's head!!!
特别立此存照,以资鼓励!
February 24 Good Friday一天是坏的,一天是好的
今天很好,终于出太阳了
用了五分钟结束了LIFE IN THE UK TEST,简单得要笑
如果欧洲各国政府要用这种简单考试来限制移民一定没什么效果,除了收点考试费.
不过通过认真读书,还是知道了如下几点
1,英国表兄妹/堂兄妹可以通婚
2,皇室不能公开发表对公共事件的评论,这就可以理解老王子怎么这么被人嫌,大概他此生只恨自己出身皇家只能做壁上观,不然他就比PM还PM
3,英国人还是很务实,很实际的 February 22 哈哈,又一条鱼导师电话告知,明天是他生日,要求一起午饭
和妈莞尔,难道相处得这么融洽,原来大家都是有点游离有点恍惚的鱼,不过他是经济学家,早已经修炼成老鲤鱼精,和妈还是一条小猫鱼,老是躲在石头底下,不敢冲浪,生怕被冲到阴沟里
论文就是大坝,早也要过晚也要过,就像人总有一死,只求不要太过折磨
小麦妈,讲个笑话给你听,英国最大的超市是TESCO,赢利惊人攻城掠地无往不胜,并且一直准备进军中国,前一阵媒体都在批评这个TESCO就和BIG BROTHER一样,利用积分卡得取顾客隐私而且很能投其所好,和爸有次拿着信回来抱怨,这TESCO管得真宽,对不起,我又要八卦了,一个成年男子无论什么性取向都是要买安全套的,如果一段时间不买了,TESCO就分析出这个人应该有了稳定的RELATIONSHIP,就开始寄婴儿用品资料做试探,而不是从前的度假啊酒啊...如果你再买了点与此相关的物品,他们就肯定你要当爹了,于是,更多的儿童咨询接踵而来.一方面,感觉是被人偷窥了,另一方面,不得不佩服人家的服务销售软件,可以细到每个积分卡的持有者.
最后,所有的大小鱼们生日好,和爸和妈合在一起过,全家吃饭去!!
February 21 夜里很饿经常是夜里一两点间,很饿,和爸自然不怕喝茶吃饼干,和妈就只敢抓包沙拉做兔子
最近的沙拉里居然有中国式青菜/小白菜,和和外婆看了就怪叫这怎么能生吃
和妈解释,有个住在美国加州的家伙天天劝人生吃,他倒是生猛,所有菜蔬类都呱叽呱叽下肚,而且也没有面如菜色
出了门五分钟,有条小背街,自诩是'LITTLE CHELSEA',有三家店和妈每周必去光顾
一家是很欧洲的店,老板很能跑马拉松,店里基本都是有机食物和欧洲大陆来得食物,和妈每周四取定好的有机蔬菜水果,满满两大箱,外加菜谱,老板也总要跟和妈讨论一下某种奇怪食物的中国吃法,比如这呆头呆脑的SWEDE,和妈讲切丝腌一下炒和凉拌都可,比如大FENNEL,和妈说你就当芹菜吃,同样南瓜可以炒肉片;如果周六上午有太阳,一家人就会跑去搞个BRANCH,两张小桌而且朝阳,老板就会笑嘻嘻给送上新烤的杏仁牛角包
另外一家是家意大利人开的,都是意大利食物,和妈每周固定买四包饼干,是和和父女俩的超级爱物,和爸常见马屁是你不喝巧克力可是煮好巧克力,你不吃饼干可是会买好吃的饼干,店里意大利太太很喜欢和和,新年还专门送和和个小兔子热水袋加大厚花袜子,还居然是让和和外婆捎回来的,买买饼干买得这么温暖,也是始料不及
最后一家,说来就非常非常八卦了,和妈之前住在BRIGHTON,过街就是一家彻底VEGAN的店,老板是个高大印度女人,还有两个儿子,大儿子沉默寡言,小二很喜欢开玩笑,每次和妈去买东西他都要问东问西,一天,和妈说小弟弟我已经三十了,她妈就大笑,这样买了两年多,后来和妈要搬家了,就去告别,老板啊,你去的那里也有同样一家店,那里老板是我前夫,虽然离婚了但是生意还合着做,和妈搬到小城后就去找那家店,发现那么近,老板是个轻言细语的英国中年人,很中年了,他的太太看起来很年青,长得和BRIGHTON的老板很像,那时他们的儿子才几个月啊,成天在店里爬来爬去,一次,和妈看到大儿子在搬货,就打个招呼,然后年青太太说你认识他们啊,在BRIGHTON的是我阿姨--这么一讲,和妈狠狠吃了一惊,看来,这个家庭关系蛮复杂,她嫁给了前姨父,也就成了本来算表弟的继母,回来就把这惊奇发现报告和爸,和爸不屑,和妈觉得意由未尽,又打电话报告从前的房东老太太,老太太听了连叫上帝这是怎么回事;自此,和妈就对这中年老板有些偏见,但年轻太太就常跟和妈讲几句,有时候没有零钱就让下次给,和妈肚子大起来后,她还老推荐和妈喝某种HERB TEA,说可以减轻宫缩的疼痛,而且还给和妈有关的文章,再后来,她又怀孕了,生了个小姑娘和我们宝宝一天的生日,见了,说还准备生第三个
和妈很喜欢这种街坊似的小店,并称之以LOCAL LIFE,和爸总说自己之前住了十年都从来不知道又这些店,和妈一年之内统统发掘出来,而且还都很不错
和妈抱怨,我的品位一直就很不错,多些钱就更好啦
和爸就偷笑,说,我们成年的年代就是ANTI-POSH,什么是本质的什么就是好的
西班牙朋友下班后也来吃晚饭,两个大男人每次都是先把肉搞光,然后象征性吃几口蔬菜,和妈就放不同蔬菜炒肉类,于是还是肉很仔细得被弄光,剩下的就是蔬菜
和和外婆说,回国天天给和爸吃狮子头去
February 20 继续生育话题最近不知道怎么搞得,只要翻开报纸就是关于家庭孩子生育的文章,感慨人类这种社会制度始终孜孜不倦地把游离的人拖回主流社会,做非主流还真困难,同时感到生育并不是想当然之中的绝对私人行为,受限制还很多的.
1,THE OBSERVER, Sunday February 19, 2006
UK baby shortage will cost £11 billion
· Career pressures blamed for shortfall · Early motherhood cuts women's salaries "...the report says the professional and financial penalties of childbearing - a mid-skilled 24-year-old who gives birth will earn £564,000 less over her lifetime than a childless counterpart, as motherhood narrows her career options - mean many are delaying pregnancy until it may be too late to conceive.."
2, THE ECONOMIST,Feb 16th 2006 The fertility business THERE is no better time than the commercial orgy that is Valentine's Day to consider the baby business. So with impeccable timing, Debora Spar, a Harvard Business School professor, has just published a fascinating book exploring how “money, science and politics drive the commerce of conception”. Happily, this is not an attempt by the management profession to reduce baby-making to strategic alliances and stretch values. But in “The Baby Business” (Harvard Business School Press) Ms Spar does take seriously the idea that there is enormous demand for better ways of creating children coming from those who find that the old-fashioned way does not work—or gives them too little control over the screaming end-product. This demand is creating a spectacular increase in supply of techniques, technologies and businesses that span everything from the egg to the mother. Fertility treatment is a business with more than 1m customers and revenues of $3 billion a year in America alone. Top-quality eggs—from a female HBS student, say—cost about $50,000. A surrogate mother costs about $59,000. Guatemala generates around $50m a year by exporting babies at around $25,000 a time. These businesses thrive, in part, because they are in a global industry that is regulated nationally, which leaves huge loopholes to be exploited by the customer willing to travel. Thus, the Cryos International Sperm Bank in Denmark is the world's largest exporter of sperm (no news yet on whether an Islamic boycott has hurt business). Guatemala's baby exports are facilitated by comprehensive, but permissive, adoption laws. And America has become a global centre for fertility treatment, because—unlike in, say, Britain—the industry is largely unregulated. Ms Spar, however, believes in the need for better regulation. She argues that governments confuse four different models of the baby market—the “luxury model” (buying a baby is like buying jewellery); the “cocaine model” (it should be banned); the “kidney model” (donation okay, trading not); and the “hip-replacement model” (some subsidy, some private supply). Instead, she wants governments to agree on regulations that curb abuses, but allow the market to function. However, given the political and ethical issues that the baby business raises, such a global consensus seems, well, inconceivable.
February 18 心有戚戚Too early, too much, too long
Parenting guru Steve Biddulph enters the childcare debate with a broadside on nurseries, and demands we find a way to allow women to work without sacrificing their children Saturday February 18, 2006 The Guardian It began 30 years ago with a phone call. A friend, a young mother, is on the line, distraught. It's her first day back at work after four months' maternity leave. Her little boy is at a nearby nursery, howling. She is howling too. I'm about to say, "He'll be fine," but instead I ask how she got to this point. She tells a story that is very familiar to me now, 30 years later. Her husband and her boss want her back at work, and her peer group are all doing the nursery thing - but in her heart, she has never really asked, what do I want? And it's taken this separation to find out.
By the end of that day, and with no prompting from me - for in those days I was an advocate of "quality care", she is back home, and doesn't return to work for 18 months more. And I am launched on a journey of concern. What do we do to parents in our society? We think we are free to choose our lives, but pressures from all around, not least the housing price crisis facing the UK, mean women, like men, are just as enslaved now as when feminism first stormed the barricades. The tyrant has changed, but the choices are just as poor. And then there's the babies, lying in rows of cots, then milling about in garish rooms through their toddler years, aching for one special adult to love them. Twelve thousand hours of this before they set foot in school. Childhood today is nothing like it was for preceding generations, especially for very young children. In 1981, only 24% of mothers returned to work before their baby was one. Today the figure is over 70%, with 95% of fathers working full-time. As a result, almost a quarter of a million British children under three attend a day nursery full- or part-time. Daycare was originally intended for three- and four-year-olds, but its use has spread downwards; some babies are now put into nurseries when they are a few weeks old. The hours have got longer too: throughout the industrialised world, millions of children under three are in nurseries 10 hours a day, five days a week. This large-scale group care of the very young has happened without prior research (compared with the invention of kindergarten, which was designed with child development needs in mind). Daycare, nurseries, home carers and nannies are an absolute necessity given our newly hurried lives. Day nurseries are an attempt to slot messy and needy young children into the new economic system, while at the same time reassuring us that it is good for them, socially and educationally. Nurseries are marketed so well that parents at home have even begun to feel that they are not as good for their babies and toddlers as "experts" might be, despite the fact that these "experts" may well be teenagers with minimal qualifications, who fell into this line of work. The critical, rarely mentioned core of nursery care is that our children will be looked after in bulk - on a 1:3 or 1:8 ratio, compared to 1:1 at home. Like McDonald's fast food, we can enjoy the convenience of drive-through; through the miracle of mass production. The rapid adoption of nursery care in the early years has been a social experiment; a gamble taken by millions of parents. The results of that experiment are now emerging. The first generation of babies raised in this way are now entering their teens and early 20s. Most western industrial countries are reporting record levels of young people with mental health problems. The proportion of teenagers in the UK with behaviour problems has doubled since 1980; the proportion with anxiety and depression has risen by 70%. The incidence of attention problems, violence problems, eating disorders, and of binge drinking and other addictions has also risen dramatically. These are not poverty-stricken children, lacking education, healthcare or food; affluent children are equally represented in this problem generation. In the past 10 years, researchers have learned that a baby's brain grows whole new structures in response to the love and affection, and caring firmness, given during its first two years of life. If this kind of intense love is not given at the right time, these areas of the brain do not develop properly. This is perhaps the most vital message: children raised without sufficient loving care do not fully become the human being they were meant to be. In the 1990s, because of the critical importance of the whole question and the widespread disagreement among experts, a number of governments were persuaded that something had to be done. In the US, Britain and half a dozen other countries, large long-term studies were set in motion to try and establish the truth. Was nursery care harmful? And if so, under what circumstances, and why? The most comprehensive US study undertaken, the National Institute of Child Health and Development study (NICHD), involved more than 1,000 children. Results have been released progressively since it began in 1991. In the UK, the Effective Provision of Pre-School Education (EPPE) study, based at the University of London, followed the lives of 3,000 children from babyhood, with extensive interviews and assessments of children's behaviour and academic performance. This study reported its results in 2004. Another large-scale study of 1,200 children was designed and carried out by the childcare expert Penelope Leach, together with the academics Kathy Sylva and Alan Stein. This study revisited babies at 10, 18, 36 and 51 months old and its results were published in late 2005. In the NICHD 2004 results, three times as many children - 17% - had noticeable behaviour problems in the over-30 daycare hours a week group, while only 6% had these problems in the under-10 hours a week cohort. According to the researchers' report, these problems included "disobedience, being defiant, talking back to staff, getting into fights, showing cruelty, bullying or meanness to others, physically attacking other people, being explosive and showing unpredictable behaviour". These increases were small, but they were present in a large number of children. The EPPE study likewise reported that "high levels of group care before the age of three (and particularly before the age of two) were associated with higher levels of antisocial behaviour at age three". The Leach study reported babies and toddlers in daycare to have "higher levels of aggression", and to be "more inclined to become withdrawn, compliant and sad". It concluded: "The social and emotional development of children cared for by someone other than their mothers is definitely less good." Perhaps most significantly for the researchers and parents, the quality of care - how good, stable, caring and educationally rich the settings were - had only a partial effect on the behaviour outcomes. Quality of care mattered a great deal, for reasons other than the ones being studied - it helped cognitive skills and literacy, and children receiving more one-to-one care in nurseries with more and better-trained staff were less stressed, but it could not undo the damage done by "too early, too much, too long". This finding had huge ramifications. The mantra of the 90s had been that poor outcomes were due to poor-quality nurseries. The studies seemed to indicate something that loving parents give in one-to-one care that cannot be substituted. Quality care was not the panacea that had been hoped for: it was still "stranger care" in a group setting, and this mattered to the proper development of secure children. The most significant factor of all in determining child mental health was called by researchers "maternal sensitivity"; the ability to respond warmly and sensitively to the needs of the child. This depends on the mother - or father - being sufficiently calm, supported and free from pressures to make the child their focus, and sufficiently resourced materially and emotionally, so that they are not depressed, lonely or overwhelmed by the demands of parenthood. This quality relies on parents having the opportunity to get to know their baby, its needs and its means of communicating them.The studies found that one of the dangers to children was that too early, too much, and too long use of nursery care could weaken maternal sensitivity - or rather, prevent it from developing. The negative effects of nursery care did not have a specific threshold or safety level in terms of the hours spent in care. The more nursery care a child receives, the more the effects received, in a proportional amount. The researchers refer to this as a dose-related effect. There isn't a safe level of nursery care usage for the under-threes (but a little is better than a lot). For anyone who knows children, this is common sense. The toddler is emotionally vulnerable, acutely aware of her social environment, who loves her, and with whom she feels safe. A toddler fears strangers, and is strongly bonded to one or two trusted adults. Babies do not have a sense of time; they cannot understand that "in eight hours' time, my mother will be back". Indeed, they are programmed to assume that if their beloved caregiver leaves, they are in danger. Their body escalates into full panic, measurable in rising levels of the stress hormone cortisol in their blood. A 2005 Cambridge University study reported these alarming results: "Toddlers starting at childcare experience high levels of stress in the first weeks after separating from their parents ... Hormone levels doubled even in secure youngsters during the first nine days of childcare ... The levels fell over time but five months later were still significantly higher than for infants of the same age who stayed at home." Children are incredibly resilient, but we should not take this for granted. The one factor agreed by all research in child development is the importance of the infant-parent bond, and how closeness of the relationship immunises a child against present and future stresses. If the only negative of long days spent in nursery is to weaken this connection, or prevent it ever growing, then this is a significant concern. A nursery situation never has a one-to-one ratio of carer to baby - it would be prohibitively expensive. The best nurseries have one carer to three babies, and often this is one to five or six when carers are filling forms, taking a break, or performing other duties. So the child gets only a fraction of the time and energy that it ideally needs. To find out what kind of interaction children receive from nursery-care workers, detailed studies have been carried out. Trained observers have rated the interaction quality between carers and children. The results are not good. Even when childcare workers know that they are being observed, they do not do as good a job as parents. There are far fewer intimate exchanges between carers and children, and interactions are more mechanical, brusque and shorter in duration. They are simply not as responsive. This is not the fault of the carer - in most cases they try their best, but there are two significant factors working against them. They are not the parent of the child, and they rarely have a long-term relationship with them. Both child and carer are just passing through each other's lives. Turnover of nursery staff is running at 30-40%, caused by low pay, poor training and low status. Of course, parents at home are also sometimes stressed, depressed, angry, unresponsive or even positively dangerous to their kids, and some kids are better off in nursery, which at least is routine, safe and (hopefully) provides some level of warmth and stimulation. But we have to ask whether there is a better way to give parents a life, and children a life too. Why does it have to be a choice of two evils - parental loneliness and frustration, or children spending long hours in the care of strangers? Surely we can emancipate women, and yet not abandon children to indifferent care ? In those European countries that have better support for families, the situation is very different. In France, Germany, and Denmark low cost, good-quality housing is supported, jobs are secure and retraining available for parents after two or three years' absence. We look like misers by comparison. Britain spends only 0.3% of GDP on early years provision, compared with 2% in Sweden. Yet in Sweden today, there are almost no babies in daycare, a new generation of parents has opted instead for the excellent parental leave and job-sharing provisions in that country. In other words, a six-fold increase in expenditure would be needed to achieve a standard that Swedish parents have decided still isn't good enough. The British government is moving tentatively in the right direction - there have been advances in parental and maternity leave. But our medieval workplace culture needs to shift dramatically to make parenthood possible. Meanwhile, some parents are choosing less affluent, more time-rich lives, and finding the joys of simpler living. Since the world needs us to consume less, and live more, this must be a good thing. Let's hope that the care of babies in nurseries might soon go the way of child labour in factories or boarding school for six-year-olds. In an ideal world ... During your child's first year When your child is one When your child is two When your child is three
P.S 一直对芬兰瑞典两国心生好感,芬兰现在从幼儿园就对孩子上课,而不是德国式的瞎玩,英国工党的教育大臣最近被迫修定教育改革方案,很多STATE SCHOOLS真太糟糕,荷兰教育看起来不好不坏.另外,瑞芬两国技术创新能力在见长,特别是芬兰这两年竞争力都全球第一,因为国家小,创新能力就格外重要,而不是抱着石油睡大觉:) February 17 我们都是双鱼再过几天就是和爸和妈的生日,两条鱼在一起,需要有如海一般宽阔的个人空间
和和是个小天蝎,与双鱼父母应该是合适的
虽然和和是小猴,妈妈是老虎
所以和妈想,即使再要弟弟妹妹(小名早定了:睦睦/美美)也至少是小猪或者小牛,绝对不能是小老虎
谈不上迷信,趋利向善是本能
柯达正式宣布停止生产黑白胶卷,一个时代的结束,大概都读过本杰明对艺术品复制的批评,怀念那一个刹那即永恒,即使粗躁,却是新鲜质朴的RAW
大概是两月前,FT上有文章讨论英国政府如何用即将空出的频道重新投牌,因为英国很快要全面数字电视/广播,这空出的频道相当有商业价值,特别是radio communication,当时,和妈就想,估计会有更多的WI-FI出现,果然,上周,电脑自动搜索出突然存在的无线网络,也就是说附近某处有了HOT-SPOT/NODE,真够快!仔细看了,很有趣,果然是运用广播频率,价格更便宜,而且商业模式虽然LOCAL却有可行性;昨天,GUARDIAN说手机运营商3准备提供某种程度上的免费SKYPE电话,这无疑是好消息,看来,无线技术潮流无可逆转,所以笔记本和PDA都需要质量更高的电池,以便适应越来越密的无线覆盖
有书讨论欧洲一低再低的出生率,尤其是德国,研究发现经济文化原因并不是主要的,主要是因为当代女性头胎生育年龄推后,直接后果是继续生育更晚更困难,但,时至今日,仍然不认为自己会在28岁前当母亲,30岁,是个能接受的年龄,尽管,一晃就将是四十
同样有文章介绍欧洲的少数民族,在西欧有Basques/Bretons/Corsicans/Sorbs/Walsers,在中东欧有Roma/Rusyns/Kashubians/Gagauz,在北欧和波罗的海有Sami/Livonians,俄罗斯境内有Veps/Selkup/Nenets,前中东欧集权瓦解后,各个被意识形态大一统的少数民族开是重新自我身份认知,并且努力争取欧盟资助,这种重新的自我文化认同不仅有文化意义,更具有经济意义
和和爷爷出生在荷兰北部的Frisland,也就是Frisian,他们有自己的语言,比荷兰语更接近英语,他们也独立,却不像WALES那么浪费纳税人的钱,让一个ENGLISH孩子在威尔士上学并且必须学威尔士语对父母来说多多少少是折磨,政治正确到了那个程度也是买椟还珠
P.S发几张扫出来的PP(去年六月初)
February 15 情人节劳动节昨晚和和出牙半夜大哭,所以没怎么合眼
早上小人生龙活虎又是好汉一条,和妈却无精打彩一杯接一杯灌自己咖啡
中午,和爸总算睡醒,几杯茶下肚后,突然有了做DIY的冲动,做什么--清洁家里的所有卫生死角,从百页窗到暖气片,从门到垃圾箱,和爸大个子可以弄高处
和爸基本是个得过且过的人,但就是特别喜欢清洁洗手间,而且视为其势力范围外人不得插手
两人都是手套消毒剂,搬这样搬那样,喷啊擦啊扔啊
搞搞搞,搞了将近四个小时,两人看起来都很狼狈,大眼对小眼,累得够呛
于是洗澡换衣服,等衣服再扔进洗衣机,发现坐下来根本就不想再动
和爸眼神恳切,怎么办,我们晚饭的位子
取消取消,谁还有力气收拾自己光鲜出门去烛光晚餐,坐在那里也会心神不定挂念在家的一老一小
干脆unconventional
于是,草草弄个豆芽鸡丝南瓜丝卷墨西哥饼两人吃,取个意思吧,好在饼是圆的:)
然后就陪咱们家的大小姐看'灰姑娘',一天看十遍,她也不厌倦
终于不唱crazy frog了,改唱Ciderella!
February 11 就要可以休假了和爸下周二就能休假一周了,圣诞节后他可忙坏了,生活就是门诊病房手术室,每天回来看到眼巴巴想和爸爸跳舞读书的女儿,就内疚得不行,前几天两人晚上玩枕头大战,和和不小心从床上摔了哭了,和爸自责得一夜辗转反侧,第二天中午还偷偷溜回来看和和,其实和和早忘了.
工党要给NHS搞改革,再不改NHS迟早也要破产,但实际操作中就有很多问题,比如要减少病人的WAITING LIST,就搞加班,夜门诊周六门诊多排手术,而且每年的一二月都是刚入行医生们的考试季节,人手奇缺;上周,和爸看了两个病人都让他很难过,一位刚过四十的太太,三周前先生突然去世,也许伤痛过度,戴隐形眼镜的眼睛严重感染,目前使用的抗生素一种对她不作用,另外一种她却过敏,最坏的估计她的左眼要失明,和爸都不知道怎样把这些告诉这位病人,打击太大.另外一位几个月大的小婴儿,出生时左眼就严重的胎记,覆盖整只眼睛,这么小的宝宝肯定不用能激光,但也不能确认胎记会不会继续压迫视神经,换句话讲,这个宝宝也许左眼基本会非常弱视,和爸回来就叹息不止,说小宝宝笑起来真可爱
当宝宝还未出生时,大概每一位父母都担心孩子是否健康,健康最重要,至于聪明和漂亮真只是锦上添花吧.
看冬运会开幕式,加拿大团的衣服真漂亮,英国这次穿得也很绅士,蒙古的帽子非常古代,中国队的衣服还是有点土啊,好在不再是那么突兀的红黄了,有一年在飞机上碰到国家短道速滑队参加在SHEFFIELD世界青年短道速滑锦标赛,有著名的大小扬杨,他们一路上都很热闹,聊起来天就骄傲得说国家队就是长春队,而且说比赛奖金比打乒乓球多多了.
入场式总是很长,所以音乐和DJ就显得非常关键,北京2008不会入场大放'运动员进行曲'吧? 2004雅典的总DJ是个荷兰人,不知道都灵这位是何方高人,整体说来,碟打得很规整
杨82和翁28(应该是杨83和翁29了)抗议批评文章而称他们婚姻是天作之合,暗道,他们真是昏了,越演越当真了,世上有几对夫妻敢夸耀自己的婚姻完美?? 批评文章写得是刻薄,但实际如此.
P.S 记得当年皮特和JA新婚后接受采访,问什么是婚姻中最好的,皮特说结婚后可以自由放屁,想来该是大实话,如果问和爸-当父亲最好的是什么,他会回答,可以在女儿面前自由放屁.不仅不会尴尬,而且会让女儿开心大笑,和爸每制造一次噪音,和和就笑着叫POO-POO!
看看,和和的头发是不是长了一点?
芃芃哥哥生日快乐,虽然迟到了:)
February 07 Neither here nor there看新闻看得很恼火,和爸还在不知天高地厚地评价中国移民是如何遵纪守法努力致富,和妈怎么听怎么觉得这种腔调很euro-centric,就忍不住打断他难得的发言.周日小城TOWN HALL有一场当地华人协会组织的春节晚会,和爸光临现场后就似乎感慨很多;这样的晚会N年前在LONDON也看过,那次是张戎站在台上施施然做VIP讲话,只记得她脚上那双鞋太漂亮了.
几代中国移民差别迥异,就个人而言,很难认同那种唐人街文化,每次去除了吃点买点,剩下就是陌生感,看BBC的'BEHIND THE BAMBOO CURTAIN-CHINATOWN',半小时后就看不下去了,大概在这种主流媒体里,CHINESE COMMUNITY还是和唐人街有关的悲欢离合,可怜和爸还每集录下认真观摩学习
做过申请难民的福建人的翻译,理由无外有三---强制堕胎/FLG/地下教会, 那些十七八岁的青年男女一路艰险却依然坚持怀孕,然后想尽办法去北爱/爱尔兰产子入籍,再把襁褓之中的幼儿送回老家,所以福建乡下大都是祖父母和外籍儿童,对于这些年青的父母,孩子几乎就是手机上的照片
新闻上又出现著名的PESHAWAR,两年多前的同名记录片讲述了一个阿富汗孩子长路慢慢偷渡到英,抱歉自己的生活经历狭窄,怎么都想象不出是怎样的经历,这个世界上每一刻都有这样的人跋涉在属于他们的路上,从漠漠黄沙的撒哈拉,从惊涛骇浪的大洋,在看美墨边境正在修筑的屏障,就已经无话可说
说什么? 说什么都不正确,就像REM悲哀唱到sometime everybody hurts
就如GUARDIAN上有文批评这些转载卡通的国家有法西斯嫌疑,特别是法意西
既然无话可说,就去煮咖啡,想,自己既不是欧洲人,也不受安拉佑护,难得成为'自由人',为什么还生这样的气? 修行不够
我们这一代人,看似自由很多,实际却站在矛盾的中间,东不成西不就
P.S 和和真得长大了很多:)
February 06 数据和和下午测身高体重,看到数字外婆妈妈爸爸都很开心
小MM看起来是很高,抱起来是很重,家里没有敢轻易抱她,和妈一抱右手腕会疼,和爸抱一会腰就疼,所以小MM最喜欢对每个人大喝'抱抱抱抱',得到的回答基本是:不抱不抱,特别每天晚饭前后她叫得尤其来劲.圣诞节在荷兰,她的表叔,一个红脸大大个,特别喜欢抱她,她也喜欢被抱,爹妈乐得偷懒.
外婆说,宝宝,你长到十岁就要比阿婆高啦,12岁就比妈妈高了:))
都长得不错,就是拜托头发快点快点长长
Age: 14 ms+2 ws
Weight: 11.40 KG (91%)
Height: 81 cm (92%)
February 05 Munich164分钟的电影,横跨欧洲,色彩偏暗,基本是男人戏
新邦德DANIEL CRAIG眼睛确实很蓝,而澳大利亚人ERIC BANA却奇怪的气质忧郁
不知为什么,一再想起OCEAN'S 12, 和BLADE RUNNER
70年代的欧洲激烈极端,现在的欧洲是暗潮汹涌,每个国家官方和媒体都小心翼翼不要搅进卡通浑水却又忍不住愤怒
试问,那些阿拉伯国家媒体什么时候停止过他们的偏见和叫嚣? 只是我们不看不听就不知道
每一次看见在游行示威的阿拉伯青少年,都忍不住疑惑-你们靠什么生活? 不会每家后院都有一口油井吧?
一个疯狂的信仰竟然狂妄到需要全世界去以他们的神为神,所以才有这样的口号:NO GOD BUT ALLAH,MOHAMMAD IS HIS PROPHET',无可想象,如果这个世界被他们一统会怎样黑暗
同时,一个民族总以外国势力做全民的假想敌,实在悲哀
纵观所谓弱势国家,无一不是以平民为法码讨价还价,同时继续信息封锁愚弄平民--信仰是神圣不可侵犯的,本国政府领袖是无比正确的,如果有错,都错在外国,要恨就恨外国强权势力
一直冷眼看欧洲小左们的悲天悯人情怀泛滥,在某种程度上也是自大更是作茧自缚,一直冷眼看国内的愤青和网上义和团,看这个政府在媒体控制上进一小步又退一大步
都说以恶制恶,是冤冤相报,何时了
只有大家统统放下屠刀,才能立地成佛
要相信法律相信证据相信文明社会
但,问题在于,两种社会没有可比性
最后只能死循环
一直在想,导演如何解释这个太重大太现实的问题
二战中屠杀和种族灭绝显然是犯罪,相比之下,辛特勒名单相对容易操作
几年前看NOWHERE IN ARFICA,肯尼亚无比美丽的自然仍然不敌远处人类的丑恶
就这一点讲,这个世界是一发而制全身
最要批评之处,依然是,一直是,电影中,男人的救赎需要通过表演所谓男性力量主导的性行为实现
这是个人最讨厌的,尽管暗杀后如惊弓之鸟已经被预测到,尚可原谅
电影中的欧洲有惊心动魄的美丽,至于影评中所谓敌人之间对话谈不上深刻,也更无哲学意义,不过是巴以每一个成年人都在问都在寻找答案的问题--什么是家园? 家园在哪里?
非常势,非常道
回来站在床前,看熟睡的宝宝
忍不住开和爸玩笑--和和多幸运,她的父亲不是秘密工作者
是的,普通的人生,普通的疼痛,普通的幸福
发痒猜它会拿奖
February 04 机场好友是湖南卫视做'晚间新闻'的总制片人,在民间很受欢迎,走的是小报喜闻乐见一路,虽然无关情色和政治,也很像荷兰某台节目'HEART OF HOLLAND'
见面聊天,劝他做个关于机场的全国性节目,无疑,随中国经济发展,航空会在交通运输中越加重要,机场就是一个相对独立封闭的小社会,每天都在上演人间的喜怒哀乐,如果有时间,会饶有兴趣地看看'ITV的AIRLINE',荷兰电视也有相同节目,内容很丰富多彩,也很搞笑
于是继续鼓动老同学做这种节目,至少飞哪里都是头等舱,虽然民航总局不怎么好说话,但解除管制和垄断是大势所趋,国际航线竞争激烈,国内航线是时间问题
三年前的贺岁片LOVE ACTUALLY,就用无数机场相逢的温情镜头煽情,真得很删情,特别是熟悉的希思罗机场,闭了眼睛都忘不掉
前几天,看TOM HANKS的THE TERMINAL,应该讲老SPIELBURG讲述了一个极端的故事,虽然彻头彻尾的美国化和主流化;TOM HANKS胖得惨不忍睹,想演出厚拙却过了火,但,也露出机场这个庞然大物背后的每一个小零件的运转
还是有煽情的片断,和妈很无辜地掉了眼泪,和和坐在地上玩,看妈妈有眼泪,就爬在到妈妈身上,摸妈妈的脸,还用嫩嫩的小手指抹掉在妈妈脸上的眼泪,爸爸在一边感动地不知道怎么办,就一把抱住自己的小女儿,用荷兰语说--OH DEAR,OH DEAR...
这么小的宝宝,就可以安慰人,虽然她不知道为什么,所以,安慰与被安慰是人的本能
February 03 爱情的海洋那一年,有SARS,取消了复活节回国的机票,看新闻看得肉紧,每天夜里给父母电话,挂了电话就忍不住哭,那一段时间突然整个人心灰意冷,亲人和牵挂的人都在国内,自己隔山隔水,除了那几句干巴巴翻过来倒过去的叮咛,其实什么实际作用也没有,越发觉得自己是废物一个
书读不下去,导师见学生垂头丧气,邀着吃饭喝酒,讲很多温暖的话,比如,第一次在课上见到她是怎样,比如,一个聪明的学生怎样才能继续聪明...先是沉默最后居然趴在桌子上哭了起来,他就劝她去看心理医生,并且讲他自己也时常去,同时相信她能恢复'正常状态'
于是接受了十周的心理辅导,结束时已经是夏天,SARS消失,天空很蓝海水更蓝
于是决定结束某些生命中不能继续的片段,人分两地,互相在现实生活中亏欠对方,我们从小被教育要大苹果留在最后吃,现在努力将来就好了-其实是严重忽略现实生活,可如果心思繁杂,便人心似海,苦海无边,还是回头是岸
刚才听国广,放'爱情的海洋',是--不是每个人都能游到爱情的对岸,努力游过那么多年,还是放弃
偶尔想,如果没有SARS,是不是能坚持游下去,哪怕上岸后说再见
和和外婆是位聪明的妈妈,她从来不问东问西,有时聊天,她会说--你看看你,没有婆媳没有姑嫂没有办公室政治没有花花草草,算福人了,日子安静人才活得长
只有这样,她不担心也不操心
再回到中学时光,读南大校报上的一篇散文,时隔多年,依然清楚
生命在一呼一吸之间,此一念彼一念,人生就三下五去二了
祝小米阿姨今年好运! February 02 图书馆小城市立图书馆离家走路就几分钟
和和每周三/五上午去唱儿歌,外婆很喜欢和她一起去,一来学唱歌,二来看小孩们,然后回来就报告谁去了谁没去,和和表现怎样怎样
和和是从不到四个月时参加儿歌组的,那时她好小,坐在妈妈怀里傻头傻脑的,慢慢慢慢,她就熟悉了那些每次必唱的儿歌,也是她睡前要听妈妈哼哼的
唱玩歌,她就坐在小木头火车上玩书,或者要外婆带她爬上楼看大书,安静的图书馆让她知道在这里不能够大声说话--看环境的影响
和妈自己总在图书馆借DVD,一周2.50镑,有时也会跑过去看会书,前几天路上遇到面熟的馆员,告诉和妈,图书室新到了点中文书,和妈大喜过去看-还真有那么几十本,中港台三地的版本,书的内容却很奇怪,有棉棉,有安顿,还有一些和妈闻所未闻的作者和出版社,让外婆来选,外婆研究了半天找到一本叶辛的小说,和知青子女回沪有关,和妈推荐外婆看看安顿的什么离婚故事啊,自己拿了本棉棉的'熊猫'--也不知道她写什么,总之是一堆在上海白相的八国联军老外,和似乎在老外圈里如鱼得水的中国MM们,照片都是真人,全是短句和梦话,然后介绍了一堆上海的夜生活场所,可以当作TIMEOUT来看看
准备周六看MUNICH,164分钟,估计出来要找地方喝一杯热的才能缓解
今天是江南小书生刘青芃小哥哥的四岁生日,祝他长得更高更壮更聪明!
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